I can't sleep tonight. So to entertain myself, I hopped on a friend's blog about an hour ago (Ellen - amazing woman, amazing wares), and once I caught up on her posts, I started hopping to the links on her site, and a lot of them are blogs by girls we went to college with.
One friend in particular is really funny. I read a few of her posts and the little anecdotes about her kiddos sprinkled throughout, and they were so funny.
Well, it was funny 'til it wasn't. I was laughing. And then .2 (that's "point 2" not "2 tenths," though I guess if you wanted to read it "2 tenths of a" that would work) second(s) later, I was crying. Not boohooing, per se, but there were tears. I want to blame it on the hour, but I know that's not it.
I guess I'm just in this place that feels marked by longing. Not that there is some longing in the mix, but that this whole season is just fundamentally marked by it. And, as it turns out, I adore my life right now.
I think you can be content and still long for things. And that kind of longing? The kind that exists, even permeates, in the midst of to-your-toes-contentment? I don't know. Somehow it's a restful place.
So tonight, while I may not be sleeping, I guess I am resting in my longing. Hurting, but resting. I now refer you back to the title.
Sweet dreams.
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3 comments:
Elizabeth - I love it. I do think both can be present - contentment and longing. You said it so well!
and...after leaving this comment, I realized that I need to go change my last name on my gmail account:-)
thanks for the kind words. i agree with e up there. in plenty or in want, contentment is possible and available. so glad to know that you are experiencing it.
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